Alex's Weekly Blog - 21st November

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel".

I went for a massive carvery earlier this week, and already the festive songs were in full flow. I guess if you work somewhere like a restaurant or supermarket that starts piping Mariah and Shaky from Halloween or even earlier, you must become immune to them after a while. Anyway, I had a big plateful, including two Yorkshire puddings, which absolutely belong on any Christmas dinner plate worth its salt. My only regret was not leaving any room for pudding. Luckily, I removed all the calories too.

Apparently, almost half of us (46 per cent, to be precise), say we're more likely to do good deeds than usual during the festive season, and an impressive 40 per cent say they feel more inclined to perform acts of kindness in the run up to Christmas. Research from Fairy Non Bio and Paddington in Peru has found that even the smallest acts of kindness can make a positive difference. The furry marmalade sandwich scoffing bear is always looking for ways in which he can spread joy, and I thought we'd have a look at the Top 10 acts of kindness that people would encourge others to do, in reverse order.

10 Compliment others - this really does go a long way. Speaking as a radio presenter with a fragile ego and occasional imposter's syndrome, someone sending a nice message about my show really does lift my morning. If you've received good service in a restaurant or shop, make sure you let them know. On social media, everyone's a critic, and positivity is a refreshing change to the usual narrative.

9 Don't laugh at others in a mean way - this is fairly self-explanatory, but treating people with respect is a good mantra for life. I even apply that to our insufferable neighbours, who I just avoid at all costs rather than having to force a smile.

8 Give things to those more in need such as donate clothes to charity - not only does this free up space in your wardrobe, but your old coats and jumpers could keep someone warm this winter. I even gave out 12 pairs of socks on Tameside Radio earlier this week. I should stress these were new socks, not my old ones.

7 Cheer someone up if they're upset - being a good listener is underrated. We all have difficult days, and having a friend who we can rant to is priceless.

6  Say hello to others - it might be seen as strange in London, but in the north, we're pretty friendly types on the whole. One of the things I found surreal about the pandemic was going for my government-approved walk and not seeing a soul on my circuit around the block. A lot of the politicians would have been tottering back from the Co-op with a suitcase of chardonnay at the same time, I guess.

5 GIve up their seat on public transport for those more in need - there is a special place in hell for those who give their bag its own seat, and scowl at the packed train carriage when you have the audacity to ask if the seat is taken. Sorry, that's not in the spirit of this article, really, but it does wind me up. Same for those who put their feet on the seats in the cinema.

4 Smile at others - not in the sinister style of the Smile horror film, hopefully, but a friendly smile really goes go a long way..

3 Hold doors open for others - basic stuff really, but this small act of kindness really is level one in the good human game of life.

2 Help others - we can all become a little self-absorbed at times, but doing stuff for other people really does feel great. Volunteers are the backbone of most local events, including stuff like beer festivals and Christmas lights switch ons that many of us enjoy. On a smaller scale, if you can be helpful to someone else, why wouldn't you choose to be?

1 Say please and thank you - old-fashioned perhaps, but seen as the most important small act of kindness in the recent survey. It makes people feel more needed, appreciated, and socially valued when they are thanked.

An old but gold quote from Maya Angelou to finish - "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". I'll raise a large glass of festive Baileys to that.